Chris and I made a big decision this spring. We decided to become foster parents while we wait for Noelle. Since then we've taken the class, completed our paperwork, gotten fingerprinted, had our first home visit, and just today we had our fire dept. inspection - all that remains for us to be certified is a trip to the doctor for a physical, a final visit from the social worker, and paperwork processing by the county to make it official. This means that in another month or two we could be getting the biggest call of our lives - to become parents to a child. Even if it's temporary, we couldn't be happier about this prospect.
A couple of weeks ago after meeting with the social worker, we began gathering the baby items we didn't already have - bottles and bibs and blankets and burp cloths, to name a few - and tonight I've begun washing clothes sent by my sisters. We don't know whether it will be a boy or girl, so I'm getting prepared for both. We're assuming it will be an infant because the social worker says there is a shortage of stay-at-home foster parents in the county, which they need for the newborns, and I'm planning to stay home. Only time will tell.
I am somewhat guarded in my excitement considering the way things have gone with our adoption timeline, but something within me says this will indeed happen and soon...which leaves me wondering, "Am I really ready? After all this time waiting, am I ready to be a parent?"
I've always imagined that before becoming a mom I would have this project completed and that bad habit kicked and this good habit down and so on and so forth. And now that it's about to happen, I have moments of thinking, "Where did all the time go, and what was I doing?" But I am also realizing that I don't really care about "getting it all done" anymore. I mean, sure, there are loose ends I want to tie up, but I know there will never be a day in which everything is done - or that I am done. I will continue to learn and grow as I watch our child do the same. Life will just keep moving us along, creating new challenges as well as some messes and lots of joy.
I bet some folks reading this are thinking we must be crazy - to put ourselves in a situation in which we will come to love a child over a period of months and then potentially "lose" that child. I put "lose" in quotation marks because I don't believe there's any way we can lose. The child may return to the birth family, but we will have been given an extraordinary gift. And another child will still be on her way to us.
This is our journey. Our eyes are open. Our hearts are ready.
A couple of weeks ago after meeting with the social worker, we began gathering the baby items we didn't already have - bottles and bibs and blankets and burp cloths, to name a few - and tonight I've begun washing clothes sent by my sisters. We don't know whether it will be a boy or girl, so I'm getting prepared for both. We're assuming it will be an infant because the social worker says there is a shortage of stay-at-home foster parents in the county, which they need for the newborns, and I'm planning to stay home. Only time will tell.
I am somewhat guarded in my excitement considering the way things have gone with our adoption timeline, but something within me says this will indeed happen and soon...which leaves me wondering, "Am I really ready? After all this time waiting, am I ready to be a parent?"
I've always imagined that before becoming a mom I would have this project completed and that bad habit kicked and this good habit down and so on and so forth. And now that it's about to happen, I have moments of thinking, "Where did all the time go, and what was I doing?" But I am also realizing that I don't really care about "getting it all done" anymore. I mean, sure, there are loose ends I want to tie up, but I know there will never be a day in which everything is done - or that I am done. I will continue to learn and grow as I watch our child do the same. Life will just keep moving us along, creating new challenges as well as some messes and lots of joy.
I bet some folks reading this are thinking we must be crazy - to put ourselves in a situation in which we will come to love a child over a period of months and then potentially "lose" that child. I put "lose" in quotation marks because I don't believe there's any way we can lose. The child may return to the birth family, but we will have been given an extraordinary gift. And another child will still be on her way to us.
This is our journey. Our eyes are open. Our hearts are ready.
Comments
Congratulations on your decision. We know you have talked and prayed a lot about this choice so you are ready. Please let us know if you need anything. We are here to support you.
Your friends,
David & Penny
rach